I FOUND YOU IN A DREAM

Nikka Gershman

I used to hate to go to sleep.

The last voice: “Shush, not one more peep!”

It was the loneliest part of the day,

But now that loathing seems far away:

Because I and the angels struck a deal,

So that when I sleep, your smile becomes real.

When the mask fades,

And unveils the shades,

Between earth and heaven,

Just like the breads leaven,

There’s a wave from across a stream;

And I found you in a dream.

Your face so bright,

The most brilliant light,

No need for a sun,

When the stars you’ve outdone.

Suddenly, everything ‘round me rotates,

My eyes jolt open, the illusion deflates.

I wiggle my fingers, but my grip is empty:

Where your hand once laid, is my vacant palm sweaty.

Your lips were so full, so vivid!

But what makes me truly livid,

Is that I can’t remember your laugh nor your voice.

It’s not like we had much choice.

I take a shuddering breath and repress my cry,

I simply can’t ask, “why did you have to die?”

I refuse to allow my tears to stain,

Unlike Orpheus, my sobs would be in vain.

My strength comes from the reawakening of rest,

I hate that only one heart beats in my chest.

But I am consoled: even though I must wait awhile,

I love to sleep, for I can see you smile.