embellishment

catching the z train by isabel daniel

ornery clownery (east bound clowns)

For you and you only, I find myself a fool. 
In desperation I have choked on breadcrumbs begging for satisfaction 
denying hunger to call you 
in thanks for so little. These insistent pleasures are all falsifications ignorant 
of your indifference to my 
flooded gates & dry veins. 
The damsel in distress is but a 
dunce in the corner. 

Do you recognise a fool 
when you ensnare her? 
A lonely lonely fool in white 
brittle boned and 
calling herself full. 

Among all I’ve never had 
I call you golden, hold you highest 
no matter 
gild nor paint nor most sombre sorrows 
all paling to exaggerated memories I build 
to convince myself enough for you. 

All this yearning, and for what? I see us in hindsight,
no longer rosy, tired of embellishment and glass diamonds.
I cannot make from missing Try as I may, 
zero by zero is still the same,
giving me exactly what you gave.